Marriage Preparation

When I joined Isiseko there was a serious breakdown of relationship between me, my wife, and my mother. This
was as a result of family matters that I was supposed to resolve before I got married and how my wife responded
to these matters. I was honestly contemplating divorce in the first year of our marriage. Challenges didn’t afford us
any time to settle in our marriage, it was a baptismal of fire. Isiseko played a huge role in teaching us about
marriage and how we relate to each other as a couple and how deal with in-laws. We had many private sessions on
character building for me and my wife and to top it all off, the founders of Isiseko facilitated reconciliation sessions
with my family. 2 When bigger storms came later in our marriage that sought to separate me from my wife, I was
well equipped to stand firm, unshaken and weather those storms. In 8 months to come we will be celebrating our
10 years anniversary. I am forever grateful to Isiseko for the positive impact in my life and in my marriage.

IFI was the place where I truly found out what a marriage is about. That it is not always about me, but that it is all
about putting the other person first and the rest will fall into place. Such a blessing to be guided by passionate,
knowledgeable, and real people. They are always available to assist. We came into the program at the end of the
series and was welcomed and made to understand that it does not matter where you start, IFI will help you get
through the courses. Really a life changing experience and highly recommended.

During the fall of 2012 we proposed marriage to each other and little did we know the journey awaiting us ahead
and we’re grateful that in the midst of almost destruction of that marriage before it even started we were saved
through coming across Isiseko family Institute when we were introduced by the founders Mr and Mrs Mbulelo
Bikwani and Dr and Mrs Wallace Mgoqi. As they looked and listen to our story, they saw it worthy to take us to a
private retreat so they can deal with our problems thoroughly and in detail. In May 2013 off we went to a weekend
away where we dealt with the underlying pernicious issues. In December of 2013 we got married and we are still
standing on that solid foundation which is still beautifully binding us together. We are grateful and blessed to be
one of the 1st couples who encountered life changing experience through Isiseko.

We have learnt the importance of how Oneness and/or United front safeguards your marriage from potential
challenges. In an event that we are faced with a challenge; we equally own a challenge regardless of a challenge
initiator. As we might have contributed intentionally/unintentionally to a challenge; for example, keeping silent
when things aren’t going accordingly thinking you are maintaining peace, whereas you had an opportunity to fix
things. Lastly, we have learnt the importance of keeping our union sacred and understanding who the owner is.

My wife and I enrolled in a marriage course the same year we married in 2014. Before this, we never had any premarital
counselling and have been dating since 2003. We then realised our more than 10-year relationship would
not sustain nor take our family and us where we envisioned our lives in the future. So, we had to unlearn some of
the bad habits we had tolerated and learn the fundamentals of a good marriage built on a solid foundation which
is Christ. But this would not have been possible without Isiseko marriage institute and our willingness to learn. As a
result, our communication has improved even when we have disagreements. However, we still have challenges
that we continue to work on as a couple, less severe than they would’ve been without the knowledge we have now.